Jen Kirkman - comedian

Thanks to my Twitter pal @mesorandy for posting this.

You know, I am outraged that Elton and his partner have a kid - but only because Elton is 62 and should give his kid a chance in hell of actually having a living father around but he IS quite wealthy so at least his kid won’t be burdened with his elderly dad’s hospice bill once he gets out of college.

Anyway - Arkansas has ANOTHER reason they are outraged and if you ask me it’s “pretty gay.”

http://coverawards.com/2011/01/26/news_elton_john_magazine_cover_censored_10981/

If you guys want to come see me FOR FREE perform in NYC - this Saturday night, Jan 15th on the John Oliver Stand-Up Show (being taped for Comedy Central) go to www.theblacklistnyc.com/johnoliver select “Show 2” & in pull down box put my name as a reference. Pass this on!!

These are the nuts that come out when innocent people die.  They plan to protest the funerals of the kids killed in Arizona.

Honestly, must WE ALL get to have free speech? (Pithy question. Please, you don’t have to answer.)

Here’s a copy of their press release:

Westboro Baptist Church(WBC Chronicles — Since 1955) 3701 S.W. 12th St.    Topeka, Ks. 66604    785-273-0325    www.GodHatesFags.com Religious Opinion & Bible Commentary on Current Events
Saturday, January 8, 2011
NEWS RELEASE (Supplemental info: background, photos, audio sermons & hymns, & video footage ␣ available free at www.JewsKilledJesus.com,
www.SignMovies.com, www.GodHatesTheWorld.com, www.PriestsRapeBoys.com, www.BeastObama.com & Blogs.SpareNot.com)
THANK GOD FOR THE SHOOTER-6 DEAD! WBC WILL PICKET THEIR
FUNERALS!
Shooter Jared Lee Laughner opened fire at a Tucson, AZ grocery store at a political rally␣shot 18, including Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords; killing 6, including federal Judge John M. Roll.

God appointed this rod for your sins! God sent the shooter! This hateful nation unleashed violent veterans on the servants of God at WBC␣hoping to silence our kind warning to obey God and flee the wrath to come. Your soldiers & fellow citizens are dying for your sins! Instead of hearing the rod, and Him that appointed it, you sent a crippled 5 WBC picketers dead. Your federal judge (in Baltimore) put WBC on W B C .    So,    God    sent    the    shooter    to    shoot    you!
laughing at you! Your federal judge is dead and your (fag-promoting, baby-killing, proud-sinner) Congresswoman fights for her life. God is avenging Himself on this rebellious house! WBC prays for your destruction␣more shooters, more dead carcasses piling up, young, old, leader and commoner␣all. Your doom is upon you! Praise His Name!
THANK GOD FOR HIS RIGHTEOUS JUDGMENTS!

I will be performing on the late show, Saturday January 15th, 2011 on a live TV taping (for Comedy Central) of John Oliver’s New York Stand-up Special. He’s the host.

All you have to do to get FREE TICKETS is go to this website and then do what I say:

http://www.theblacklistnyc.com/johnoliver

Click on “any show” but then in the drop down list indicate that the performer named “Jen Kirkman” referred you. That’s me.

Come out and show Comedy Central that I have people who will represent!!!

Oh! And the show is being filmed at NYU’s Skirball Center. So go here to figure out how to get there. http://skirballcenter.nyu.edu/

Great post Snappy! Great story too. Inspiring.

I hope everyone is ready Snappy Kyle’s blogs.  He’s a good dude with a conservative bent. We - I won’t even say disagree. We just have very clear ideas of our own.

Anyway - moving on thought I’d address something I saw on TV tonight re: the handouts that we’ve all been tricked into seeing SS and healthcare as: I just feel that #1 As long as Social Security exists and for example, I’ve been paying into for 21 years, I don’t want that money stolen from me.

My parents paid into it for 50 years and if it’s taken away from them, will they get all the money they paid into it?

GWB used some Social Security treasury and replaced it with IOU’s.

My problem with personal responsibility politics is that an individual American might not want “hand-outs” and when they see a politician who agrees - they’re on board.  But some Republicans & Dems are not wanting to defund Social Security as a moral “no hand-out” policy - it’s to privatize it and make BIG money.

Secondly, nothing like Social Security is a hand out. We pay into it.

These programs GAVE America the middle class.

Lastly - national healthcare WILL NOT Bankrupt America.  The lobbyists and corporatists and health care companies WANT this money - they want us paying insane premiums.

I get health insurance from the Writers Guild of America if I make a certain amount of money per year. I switched from my insurance that I got at the E! network. I had a one month lapse where I wasn’t covered. I was willing to pay for my own insurance and was told COBRA would be $1503 a month for my husband and I. We couldn’t afford it so went without insurance for a month.

Now am I lazy? Or not working or not pulling myself up? Nope.

Now national healthcare will SAVE the country money.  There is much info on this.

Right now people are using emergency rooms.  A sick nation and unhealthy nation (not filled with freeloaders) makes us weaker.

All I hear from militant types is that America is the greatest country in the world and if I don’t like it I can leave.

Okay, so let’s be the greatest country and have health care for all. We would all pay very little into it and we’d all be fine. If you got cancer or your parents did, you would not have to die because you can’t afford treatment.

I will be performing on the late show, Saturday January 15th, 2011 on a live TV taping (for Comedy Central) of John Oliver’s New York Stand-up Special. He’s the host.

All you have to do to get FREE TICKETS is go to this website and then do what I say:

http://www.theblacklistnyc.com/johnoliver

Click on “any show” but then in the drop down list indicate that the performer named “Jen Kirkman” referred you. That’s me.

Come out and show Comedy Central that I have people who will represent!!!

Oh! And the show is being filmed at NYU’s Skirball Center. So go here to figure out how to get there. http://skirballcenter.nyu.edu/

This is for my blog friend Snappy Kyle and other Republican friends of mine.

I do not generalize re: Republicans. Or I do but I’m generalizing about Boehner and those in lock step with his ideals.

The people that voted the new crop of R’s in to the house felt that they were doing so because they want America’s economy running again because Obama ruined it.

I do agree that Obama is not helping much by adhering to destructive Bush policies but I’m not sure what the constituents would think if they actually knew that the people they voted in - want to make it hard for them to get their healthcare and in the future their Social Security. And lots of Dems are on board with this shit too.

But right now - I feel there is an ANTI-Republican streak in the R party - it’s been hijacked by people who are ANYTHING but conservative with our money.

Also - I agree. Most don’t care about us and the ones that do seem fringe and weird simply because we can’t even tell what honesty looks like anymore. Or the ones that are honest can’t seem to find their balls once elected to stand up to lobbyists.

In this day and age where corporations run the White House - I’m not even sure if we can use words like Democrat or Republican anymore because both parties (IN GENERAL) are one party: Corporatist.

Would love a legitimate four-party system.

Too bad Nader is too old. (In my opinion)

GOP vows to undo what little of a healthcare plan we have (WITH NO PLAN OF THEIR OWN that isn’t just a giveaway to insurance companies)…they vow to roll state aid back to pre-stimulus levels cutting programs like EDUCATION, MEDICAID and TRANSPORTATION. They also vow to block environmental reform.

YOU voted for these people because you are fooled into thinking they are for your best interests and that they are just like you. THEY HATE YOU. So why don’t you stop hating yourself? You deserve to do real research. Turn off the Glenn Beck. You want a tea party? Have some Lipton and invite your girlfriends over. There’s your tea party.

For fuck’s sake people.

I’m trying to help here.

WASHINGTON — Two House Republicans have cast votes as members of the 112th Congress, but were not sworn in on Wednesday, a violation of the Constitution on the same day that the GOP had the document read from the podium.

The Republicans, incumbent Pete Sessions of Texas and freshman Mike Fitzpatrick, missed the swearing in because they were at a fundraiser in the Capitol Visitors Center. The pair watched the swearing-in on television from the Capitol Visitors Center with their hands raised.

I FUCKING CALLED IT. I said when Elizabeth died a few weeks ago…how long until John Edwards proposes to Rielle? I thought it would take less than 2 months. I WAS RIGHT. Boo to all of you who said my comment was in poor taste. Blame the man in poor taste. Not the semi-intuitive messenger. (me)

http://www.nationalenquirer.com/john_edwards_asks_mistress_rielle_hunter_to_marry_him/celebrity/68137

Now, you might say, “Oh but that’s the National Enquirer.” Listen, people. This isn’t 1988. The NE gets news because they bribe people and they were the ones who broke the story of his affair.

Why am I so passionate about this? I’m really not. Just proves a theory I had…so I get excited.

Back to your lives.

I know you kids like that Twilight stuff so I thought I’d stay relevant and re-post some vampire news.

After retreating from the Washington fray after getting a new heart pump in July, former vice president Dick Cheney is resuming something of his normal routine: hunting, socializing, and headlining events for Republican politicians. His doctors say the new heart pump, which assists his weak heart by pushing blood through his arteries, has saved Cheney’s life. But the famously decisive former VP faces one more hard decision: whether or not to pursue a full heart transplant. Heart pumps are usually used as a last resort or as a temporary solution ahead of a heart transplant. Cheney is almost too old to qualify for a transplant, so he has only a few months to decide.

**Also - if you’ll remember she said years ago that she didn’t know if the world was round or flat because she was too busy trying to put food on the table for her son. Maybe this new husband can help with that and Sherri can finally figure out that she can’t fall off the planet!

Hey - leading off this thanks is thanks to Snappy Kyle for the reblog of my meat post.

I wish had made more specific that I know not much of hunting and people who personally hunt to get their meat. My personal vegetarianism (worst album title) is to not participate in the meat industry - the fast food joints that deforest, the conditions the animals are in at slaughterhouses (not so much for “emotional” reasons but raising too many animals in small spaces usually points to use of hormones…)

ANYWAY I appreciate Snappy’s and others words that my post encouraged civilized debate. Because there is the animal rights vegetarian debate which I guess would condemn hunting - but my take is health, environmentalism and “other.”

Of course, while I doubt I could bring myself to shoot an animal, (bad aim, fear of guns, loud noises, guilt) I don’t ever want to take away anyone’s right do so.  I stay far away from any argument that is purely based on “Well, what I WOULD do…”

But I do try to just educate a little bit when it comes to things that have been proven would help us all out a little bit - which is if you consume packaged, processed meat from chain grocery stores or fast food - being a little more conscious of it could do a world of good for everyone - your kids included.

But I say that not because I’m a comedian with a small following but because I’m a vegetarian with a blog. (Gross.)

Anyway - thanks!

Some of the comments in this article bum me out. I hate this macho attitude towards meat.  And I hate this attitude that singers and other artists should shut up and not be political or socio-political.  I’m sorry but most people I know who perform, it goes hand in hand with a deep compassion and need to serve. Especially people who earn so much - they want to give back.  I don’t see comment trolls doing anything to help our environment, animals, or their fellow human’s health. This bully/macho attitude of “shut up and sing” and “fuck that I like meat” is sooo boring.

I read a book about deforestation when I was 14 and quit eating meat then and there. I had always wanted to be a performer but I also got this intense urge to be environmentally conscious. I tried to get my friends to do it with me but to no avail. Should I just “shut up and do comedy” and environmental causes are important to me? Why must people pick one thing and then shut up about the rest? Does anyone do that in real life? Do I say, “Hey accountant, shut up and do numbers, stop coaching your kid’s baseball team.”

Good for Paul McCartney - and he’s not even my favorite Beatle.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/01/04/paul-mccartney-urges-india-to-declare-vegetarian-day_n_804047.html

President Barack Obama last month signed into law a two-year extension of Bush-era tax cuts for millions of Americans, including the wealthiest, in a compromise with Republicans.

Republicans, who this week take control of the House of Representatives, want to extend all Bush-era tax cuts “permanently” for the middle class and wealthier Americans. They are also demanding spending cuts to curb the $1.3 trillion deficit.

Sixty-one percent of Americans polled would rather see taxes for the wealthy increased as a first step to tackling the deficit, the poll showed.